Carys Weldon Blog

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Sex and speaking

Warning: big bad sex words (and acts) mentioned. [but not described, sigh.]

Last night, I watched the sit-com Scrubs. Have you seen it? It's funny, imo.(in my opinion)

On there, a doctor choked during surgery. His superior suggested (in a round about way using every term but THE word) that he masturbate before surgeries in the future so that he could relax.

That show is all over the unacceptable and taboo. It's a bunch of immature doctors and hospital workers, that may be brilliant as health care givers, but socially on a runaway train with a bad party going on--or something. (Yeah, I know. My metaphors stink. Feel free to toss a couple good ones on me--any time!--stay away from cliche, k?)

In itself, the moment was stunning because I don't think they'd gone there before. But what do I know? I just found the show this summer--and I guess it's had a many seasons run and is at an end or something. (I'm always behind the times.)

Anyhow, that aside...this morning I came across this BBC article that seems to be addressing a similar topic. Have sex before you speak. It says:

Sex 'cuts public speaking stress'

Forget learning lines or polishing jokes - having sex may be the best way to prepare for giving a speech.

You can read the rest of the article here:

I just thought it was interesting that I see the show/episode last night and the first article I see online this morning is the other. Conclusion...? The great forces think we should do one or the other (or both) more before big events? Maybe?

Which brings me to a terrible question. (Geez, bringing up the religious angle again.) All my life, I've gone to church...where masturbation is taught as a sin, and where sex outside marriage is, too. Although there are a lot of people in the bible who have sex outside of marriage. And it is implied that people like Saul/Paul did both of the above and much, much more before his big switch over (which tells me God forgives some people for this, apparently--LOL--but he may strike you down first, eh?)

I wonder about all the things I've ever been taught. One one hand, my husband tells me that all religion was ever about is controlling the masses. If you are kept from doing things, or made to feel guilty and confess every little thing, they (powers that be) always know the worst of what you're up to.

On the other hand, I struggle with the statistics. If the urge to have sex (and/or masturbate) is so strong, why did God give it to us--so we would feel bad about it? So we could learn control over it/our physical urges? Is that possible? And who wants to control their urge to have sex, really?

Do you think masturbation or sex is wrong? Do you struggle with what you were taught as a child and what you've come to reason out on your own?

I found these statistics on women masturbating:

Next Time You Masturbate, Just Think...

*There are about 6 billion people on the planet, half are women = 3,000,000,000

*Five out of seven are of an age where they are likely to masturbate, or are at least able to = 2142857143

*About 60% of women (admit they)masturbate (source Kinsey etc) = 1285714286

*Women seem to masturbate about twice a week on average (our survey and reading around) - 2571428571 sessions starting per week.

*= 734693877 sessions starting per day, or 30612244 per hour, or 510204 per minute, or 8503 per second (That must mean 8500 female orgasms per second in the world!)

*An average session (excluding multiple orgasm women) lasts 4 minutes (source Kinsey) so 2040816 women, on average, are masturbating at any time....


(I found those at, a site you might enjoy browsing.)

On the same topic, I found a site about masturbation and myths that say that about 90% of all men masturbate.

There's a lot of sub-titled discussions and articles on the subject here:

I thought the section on myths was funny/interesting.

But, I got educated on more. I learned the term Mutual Masturbation. It says...

"Mutual masturbation is often termed the safest type of sex you can enjoy with a partner. Since it is self stimulation and the male never enters the female, no fluids are exchanged. This prevents pregnancy and STDS.

"Since Aids has been public, mutual masturbation has been taught in many sex education classes in high schools ~ remember, they teach what intercourse is also. They teach mutual masturbation as a choice, a form of abstaining from sexual intercourse."

You'll also find discussions on sex after menopause, and sex and teens.

Going here:
I found a religious site about men and masturbation. It quotes a book written in Waco Texas, of all places, called The Sexual Man.

It says:
"Psychologist Archibald Hart wrote a book entitled The Sexual Man (Waco, Texas: Word, 1994). His book contains surveys he conducted on the subject of masturbation. He surveyed married men who masturbate and asked them how they felt about their masturbation. Almost all of the married men who masturbated (97 percent) said they did not "feel guilty." Only 2% thought that it was "shameful."

You would think that would mean that 97-98% of these men would say that masturbation was "normal." But what was unusual was that Dr. Hart could only find 13% of the men who said they "felt normal about masturbation." That's odd. So what does this mean? Either these men genuinely don't know how they feel or they have a lot of confusion about their feelings. On the one hand, "97 percent said they don't feel guilty, but only 13 percent said it felt normal."

I think these results show that a rationalization has taken place in our society. In spite of what society, movies, books, and "sex experts" tell us -- in spite of what men say they believe -- most men still don't feel "right" about masturbation. Many of the married and unmarried men I have spoken with actually "agonize" over their practice of masturbation. Why? Is this God's viewpoint? Is it the persuasive power of uptight Christians making people feel guilt about their masturbation?"

I highly recommend the reading of the rest of the article. Skip down to the part about Masturbation and the bible. It is interesting to see this preacher saying that Masturbation is not a sin listed in the bible--but lusting after someone/an object like porn IS.

He warns that masturbation could become a compulsive act. (Duh.) And he also gives some discussion on overcoming it.

My favorite point that he makes is one that can be applied to dieting or patience with others, or just about anything else--

*Work on victory only one day [one hour, one minute, one second] at a time:

*Never think about getting victory for the rest of your life.

*Here is the way to think: "My roommates are all out of the apartment. Lord, just let me get through this one afternoon."

What do you think?

Posted by CarysWeldonblog :: 4:35 AM :: 0 Comments:

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